“I Am Being Used” — A Core Limiting Belief

This belief turns giving into a trap.

You don’t just question people’s motives — you expect them to take.

Even when you offer help or show up for others, part of you is already calculating: Will they return the favour? Or will they disappear when I need something?

You anticipate exploitation, overextend yourself to stay safe, then feel resentful — and alone.

This isn’t about being cynical. It’s about being wired for imbalance.

At ShiftGrit, we help you break the belief that says you’re just a resource in other people’s lives.

How It Manifests in Your Life:

• You feel like people only come to you when they need something

• You struggle to ask for support — but feel frustrated when it’s not offered

• You overgive out of obligation, not choice

• You assume generosity will be taken advantage of

• You withhold connection or vulnerability because you expect exploitation

Common Emotional Triggers:

• Someone asking for your time, labour, or emotional bandwidth

• Moments where you’re not reciprocated or considered

• Being praised for your “strength” when you’re struggling

• Watching others receive support without having to earn it

• Relationships where your value feels transactional

What Therapy Does to Break the Cycle:

At ShiftGrit, we don’t just help you set boundaries — we help you rewire the internal lens that expects extraction.

Through Pattern Reconditioning, we:

• Trace this belief to early patterns where your role was to give, please, or serve in order to belong

• Unpair generosity from self-erasure

• Teach your system to discern between genuine connection and strategic compliance
  
  

You’re not a tool. You’re not a function. You’re a person — and you get to be one.

👉 Book a session today →

Related Belief Expressions:

• “People only want me for what I can give”

• “If I stop being useful, they’ll leave”

• “No one shows up unless they need something”

• “I’m just the support role in everyone else’s story”

• “I don’t matter unless I’m helping”

Develops Into:

• Codependent relationship dynamics

• Burnout masked as loyalty

• Emotional withdrawal or chronic resentment

• Transactional views of connection

• Cynicism about relationships or help

Emotional Regulation: The Key to Rewiring the Loop

This belief turns your Walnut Brain into a debt collector — tracking imbalances, withholding vulnerability, and scanning for signs you’re being used.

We help you stop performing value and start embodying worth.

Giving can be generous — when it’s no longer survival.

Related Resources:

• Avoidance & Disconnection Pattern →

• I Do Not Deserve →

• I Am a Burden →

Related Content:

• SlideShare: “I Am Being Used” — How to Stop Overgiving and Start Being Seen →

• Blog: From Helper to Whole — Rewiring Transactional Identity

Explore the Therapy Path for This Belief

Want to see how this belief shows up in real life — and how we treat it at ShiftGrit?

👉 View the Core Belief page →

Want to Break Free from “I Am Being Used”?

Therapy helps you stop measuring your value by what you give.

You don’t have to earn belonging — and you don’t have to protect yourself by giving everything away.

👉 Book a Therapy Session →